16: Franklin Graham, Pete Buttigieg, and Irish Lips

This week, Karen and Bonnie poke at Franklin Graham, one of the most misreable-seeming men to be filled with the joy of salvation.

Graham tweeted a happy birthday to Melania Trump, calling her the classiest first lady AMERICA HAS EVER HAD. Eat it, Mary Washington and Jackie Kennedy! Twitter did their thing and went after him. We’re sure he has to ask for repentance after seeing all the photos people responded with.

Melania Trump

Bonnie can’t help thinking of Franklin, the puppet from Arrested Development. Our intro and outro music is an homage to that show.

Franklin and Gob.


We go over how Franklin Graham got kicked out of school for keeping a coed out past curfew, a story Bonnie doesn’t totally believe. And, how the loving man of God publicly called for Pete Buttigieg to repent of his gayness.

Karen tells of staying at a beautiful castle in Colorado she didn’t know was the headquarters of the conservative college student group The Navigators. They also use it as a hotel. NO ALCOHOL ALLOWED. Karen died. Her funeral is Saturday.


Send us your funny letters HERE! We still pander for Facebook likes, Ratings, and Reviewers (click over there to the right to be taken to iTunes). It’s the best place to leave reviews, but we’ll take them on any platform!




Bye now!

15: Remembering the Humor of Rachel Held Evans

This week, Karen and Bonnie do something a little different by honoring exvangelical author and thinker Rachel Held Evans who passed away a few days ago at the age of 37.

Rachel wrote the satirical book “A Year of Biblical Womanhood,” where she tried to live as the Bible instructs women to be as a way to point out how ridiculous it is to follow the Bible to a T, but to follow the spirit of it. They also talk about her call to tell Christians how to do and use humor.


Rachel Held Evans

B and K take a swat at Franklin Graham’s tweet wishing Melania trump a happy birthday, and calling her the classiest first woman the country has ever ad, and what the unnamed-3average American thinks is classy.

Plus, they read a letter by The Graceful Atheist recounting his time as the MC of Action House, a program of hip and uber-cool church kids who reenact Christian music videos. Bonnie and Karen are as embarrassed for him as his wife is. There is also a cameo by Katy Perry in his story.unnamed-1.jpg

Church Lock-ins, Funerals, and Easter Condoms

58711617_617915378707795_5791006445029818368_n.pngBonnie and Karen has a few false starts this week as they talk about church lock-ins. Join us as we tell you about them in real time. Horny kids, pizza, one bathroom, what could go wrong?images-4.jpg

Lock-ins have evolved since we were teens, and now there are bouncy castles and kids suing the church for stupid youth minister pranks. They get bands, go to Walmart, go to malls, jump at one of those trampoline places for exxxactly 90 minutes.

Karen tells about her kids have gone to church lock-ins. They were amazing and huge with concerts and junk food. Then they returned home with church “dollars” they could buy cheap-ass toys at the church, to get them to return.images.jpg

They read a letter from Stacey about her Jewish kids attending a Baptist church funeral. Culture shock. Then down the Christian funeral spiral Karen and Bonnie go, going off about how faith funerals are less about the dead and more about trying to convert the attendees.

Bonnie tells about how she screamed at a pious co-worker once and feels badly about it. Karen tells her the woman deserved it. Then Karen shares57611770_10217678680574179_8726830081785200640_n.jpg her giddy moment of finding out kids put condoms all over her neighborhood the day before there was going to be an outside Easter service.

Don’t Be and Asshole!

Bye, now.

13: Stop Believin’: The Story of Trump and Paula White

Karen tells Bonnie about Paula White, an evangelist who “led Trump to Christ,” and has continued to be a big influence on him. It’s a story few know about, but everything becomes clear once you do.

We recorded this on the Saturday before Easter. Trump has inconvenienced Bonnie because both the laaaadies grew up near Mar-a-Lago, and Bonnie is still there. Trump has screwed up the US as well as the traffic in their hometown.

Trump and Paula White

Karen launches into the story of how Trump became a Christian. It is the story of one Paula White, a televangelist who supposedly led him to Christ. If only Mar-a-Lago could have gotten more channels because Trump could only get a few stations and one would broadcast Paula White and Jim Bakke

Trump called her up and the rest is the most corrupt history ever. She led him to Christ, for whatever that’s worth, and told him when to run for president. She is his closest spiritual advisor. One of his others is Bonnie and Karen’s old pastor. Yay.

Paula White not only believes that God wants everyone to be rich (hmmm, no wonder Trump likes her), but she is on her third husband and it is no other than Jonathan Cain of Journey. Please enjoy this delightful clip of them singing together on the Jim Bakker show.

Bonnie reads a letter from Rose about all the things she wasn’t allowed to listen to or watch. Four of which are magic and David Bowie’s “bulge.”unnamed-1

For the Don’t Be An Asshole segment, Bonnie and Karen go off on people who filter out their facial lines for social media.

Send your funny letter. We love to read them.

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Oh, and Happy Birthday, Steve!

Bye now.


Christian School, Sex Talk Sunday, and Playboys in Dumpsters

This week, Bonnie and Karen discuss their time in Baptist day school. They read a listener’s letter about bringing her boyfriend to church and the Sunday School teachers deciding to divide the boys and girls up so they could talk about sex. And what would Christian school be without unruly boys who dive in dumpsters and pull out nudey magazines?

Bonnie tells about becoming an unintentional elementary school racist while Karen just twirls around a pole until she falls down. But, those times made this amazing podcast possible, including the Charlie’s Angels references.


Bonnie pulls out an old yearbook and reads what Karen wrote Bonnie. You can see the genius blooming “write” there.

Karen tells the story of how she tried to break into the cool girls group by revealing the secret that 70’s heartthrob, Andy Gibb, was going to be the new Minister of Youth. She totally believed Andy would leave his lucrative career and move to her church and lead them in a rousing chorus about not leaving your light under a

Andy Gibb


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Transregurgitation, Mike Warnke, and Cement Butts

Karen and Bonnie read a letter from a listener who had an unfortunate incident with a downloadhymnal, they discuss the Satanic High Priest turned Christian comedian, Mike Warnke (all those monikers are LIES), and finish off with a discussion on body augmentation.



Bonnie recounts how much we were at church during the week growing up. Sundays all day, Wednesdays, going out with youth group friends and not tipping the waitstaff properly. A great witness for Christ.

Please Subscribe, Rate, and Review. You can do it wherever you listen. Not only does it help the podcast become visible to more people, it reviews can inform the haters that you can combine frivolity and religion.

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This week, K and B…Satan, Bonnie’s favorite subject. Karen recounts a story where a friend from Baptist college calls her after decades to ask her what she can tell him about being Wiccan because she announced she was an atheist. Soooo atheism = devilness.

Bonnie reads a listener’s letter about going to a Catholic school. An unfortunate incident occurs!It leads us to beg for someone to make crosstitch or draw or paint or graphic 0design “Cheetos and Jesus.”

Bonnie goes against all our mission statements for the podcast and does RESEARCH, sharing about a special sink and drain that Catholic churches have to get rid of communion left-overs, even when they are combined with gross things (see above letter).

imagesThen we get into the shyster of Church in the 80s. Mike Warnke, Satanist High Priest-turned Christian comedian. Oh, this fucking guy. What a conman. But his lies molded a generation and impacted their mental health.

DBAA (Don’t Be an Asshole)

Bonnie tells about responding to mean Christians with their own medicine. She also says, “nani nani boo boo.”

Karen talks about getting botox and is not ashamed!

We love all our listeners and it’s so fun to interact on all the socials! Have a great week.



Signs, Wonders, and Male Strippers

Bonnie and Karen discuss signs from heaven. Does God send signs to show his love, unnamed-1direction, or hilarious humor? Or is life random? Plus—they get kicked off an ex-Christian forum for being “therapists,” God sends Karen a busload of male dancers, and they read a letter from Faith, who proves her name is ironic.

Listen on: Stitcher iTunes  Spotify Himalaya

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Signs and wonders are a way God supposedly still shows his face these days. Whether it’s a butterfly that lands on your shoulder or, like Karen’s story of an old Baptist acquaintance posted, God blessing a family and their move into a new house by making the weather good that morning (also happening right then? The Haiti earthquake that killed children).

B and K read a letter from Faith about all the amazing ways God gives signs to his people. Forget the rainbow after the rain, bring on the discount on a Smart Car!

Robbie Williams

Bonnie tells about all the signs that appeared when she was trying to pitch a television show about Robbie Williams, and Karen recounts her time of swearing off guys to focus on God. And then what comes barreling down the road, stops

Chippendales, sort of.

and asks her a question? A busload of Chippendale dancers. Oh, God, you crack us up!

DBAA (Don’t Be an Asshole):

Karen and Bonnie are revamping our ending segment a bit to tell of when we’ve been assholes. Somehow, they end up still complementing themselves in the process. Bonnie talks about being impatient while Karen called someone a shit pile. But they’re also thankful for things like television and dog grooming.

Barney Miller so brown.

Godly Women, Dead Arms, and Christian College Pranks

Karen and Bonnie discuss Proverbs 31—being a gawdly woman. They’re off to buy flax and wool to sell at the market, deliver sashes to who knows who, get up at the crack of dawn and make stuff for their household, while also dressing them oddly in purple and red. If you don’t know the verses in the Bible that tell all the tasks women need to be up to, then crack the Word.

Mysogynistic Ad

Bonnie reads a few verses—there are way too many—where we find our woman being a perky worker while the man literally sits.

Karen tells of her workbook, The Virtuous Woman, which she started when she was a wee teen and then moved on to the Women’s Devotional Bible. The Bible had devotionals by Ruth Graham and Joni Eareckson Tada in it. Remember her and her horrifying story?!download-2


A freak accident of Joni becoming paralyzed make Bonnie and Karen paranoid as youngsters.


But, we can’t get over listener Jenni’s hilarious letter about pulling a “rapture prank” on someone at her Christian college.download-3


We turn serious and tell you about a great organization, Recovering From Religion. Help is there if you need it.

The Rapture, Kirk Cameron, and Foot Washing

Will you be on the toilet when the rapture comes? This week, Karen and Bonnie fumble through some rapture theories, reminisce about the times they thought they’d been left behind, and, well, that brings up the book series Left Behind—which spawned D movies starring Kirk Cameron and Nicholas Cage. Plus a gross letter about feet from a listener.

Fred done been raptured.


We’re playing with show notes and seeing what people need/will read. Let us know at deconversiontherapypodcast@gmail.com.


Here are some of the clickable and gawkable highlights:

The rapture movie that scared the shit out of a generation: A Thief in the Night. I see you can watch it on Amazon Prime and YouTube. Have a blast.

A Thief in the Night





Make it a rapture horror binge. See Kirk Cameron not smiling. Watch Nicholas Cage looking like he always does in serious roles.

Left Behind starring starry star Nicholas Cage. Earlier ones with Kirk Cameron.


Watch out for the Anti-Christ figure. He is supposed to be a charismatic leader who does makes even Christians think he’s godly.


We read a letter from an anonymous woman who taught at a Catholic school. During a faculty retreat, they had to wash people’s feet. She is forever damaged from having to wash “that creepy teacher’s” toe jam.

This week’s (did you notice we’ve moved to weekly?) QNTBWA—Quest Not To Be Whiney Assholes—Bonnie’s thankful for SNL keeping the humor real. Pete Davidson’s joke comparing the boycott of R. Kelley to the non-boycott of the Catholic church and its abuse issues was spot on.

Karen is thankful that the sun finally came out where she lives. Her light box has been her assistance animal.

She was also thankful for National Women’s Day, although Bonnie has her reservations. Then there are the tennis players who just don’t get it at all.unnamed-1

We want to give a shout-out to the podcast Everyone’s Agnostic. They do an amazing job at really digging into the deconversion experience. AND they employ substance, something we do not. Give them a listen!





Abducted in Plain Sight, John Mulaney, and Postcards from Jesus

Bonnie and Karen attempt to explain why the incredible story told in the Netflix documentary that has everyone freaking out, Abducted in Plain Sight (spoilers ahead), makes more sense when you grow up in church.

Abducted in Plain Sight on Netflix

Hi, everyone. On this episode we, Karen and Bonnie, asked for people to review us on your podcatcher of choice.






There’s a meme contest going on over at our Facebook Page. And if you want to discuss the podcast or anything related to it, you can request to join our closed discussion group. By the way, the winner of the meme contest gets a heathen prophecy.

Screen Shot 2019-03-14 at 12.45.55 PM
Deconversion Therapy Podcast Facebook Page


Although Bonnie and Karen grew up in the Southern Baptist church, Karen went non-denominational, so had experience with prophecies and healings and having the demons of yoga and intellectualism (too much thinkingggg) cast out of her. It didn’t take, we assume.


Then B and K get into the real stuff—the Netflix documentary Abducted in Plain Sight. There are spoilers, if you think you’re going to watch it. However, if you’re not, Bonnie summarizes it. People have been losing their minds over the documentary, but B and K think they can see why this kind of thing could happen: the church. In this case, the Mormon church, which is even odder than ours was.

We read a hilarious letter from listener Gabe that echoes that church kids can be pretty messed up. Yay us!

Karen then goes off on a recent ploy from Nashville churches to send postcards out to a thousand residents. Karen is very salty about this bullshit. vnuaig15ere21-1

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